i am a rogue. i am a dorian gray.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Back In The Beautiful Light - Part 1: Diniwid Dreamings

Oh there is too much to tell you!!!

It has been a while and you have no idea what joy it was to be back in my second home Boracay. Time that was truly, madly, deeply well spent I could simply curse out with all the letters in the alphabet--just to show you how good it was to be there! I felt like I was alive again. Renewed far away from the city life that I've always known and momentarily returned to. Rejuvenated from the deluded one track mind of a third world metropolis that was getting to me. And if that was not enough, simultaneously it seemed that I needed to start panning out my next plan of action on a little curveball creeping up in the horizon for the next year (year today that is).

But before I could choose that one chess piece, I needed to experience bliss. Release myself from catering to the world and attend to the silent restlessness within me. It was Christmas and essentially a time to satisfy that high maintenance vanity  I've mentioned before. So I booked my flight, dragged an equally adventurous gal pal and swandived into what I called my pursuit of happiness. Starting off in a corner of the island I have come to infinitely love, in a charming cove called Diniwid.


there you were, the reality of you: steadfast, faithful and ever beautiful. i am home.


a face i have longed to see. its like you never left me.


the salt of the sea on our skin, a foreign madonna conversing and cradled in the backdrop,breakfast as our            feet and legs inevitably lather with the sand.

                             

--our sense of sleep gladly consents itself to wait.




"come now", the island said to me, "and try something new--live like a tourist for a change."




without further ado we give in to you and let time stand still.


and yes make little lots of time for the SOP chick drill.









seventh heaven in your sun kissed us with your musings.



on a day you let us be ourselves, recuperate and come back to being "me"



you coddled and cared for us


 like a babe born from your own sweet womb

But dont get me wrong, I'm not as miserable as one might think I would be living in Manila. I am happy to be near my family and spending time with friends dearest to me.What's best is being here opened up my heart to a new love worth committing my life to: yoga. Now thats another blog entry or perhaps another blog ;)

Part 2 of Back In The Beautiful Light coming soon!!

photo credits to my superwinnerwinnerchickendinner gal Kat Misa

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

my space

 before i said goodbye to my mt luho home. here's a quick tour of the prettiest apartment i have ever lived in. a sampling of what my (now defunct) early mornings were like in the mountain island.

                                                    it was a rainy 630am


was all showered and ready to start another day at work
  
                                 but as soon as i was done with breakfast

                                the weather just pressed on a little harder

                     i decided to have a little post breakfast read

                                        to pass away the time




 
                                        and yes camwhore a little


i miss having my own space. i have been back home in this dirty city for two months now shacking up with my mother and brother. they're alright i'll tell you and my cats have now recognized me already. but just recently i had an interesting personal experience--that unknowingly had deepened things into perspective on this side of the fence. isn't awesome how some things can make you feel like you've come home or wake up to a whole new world? i sort of know what to do now more. i suppose i would like to have my own space again. here in Manila perhaps or somewhere else in the Philippines, maybe back in Boracay or elsewhere in the world. hopefuly it would be as pretty as my apartment loft (more pretty pictures from my phone to come--now where did i put that damn cable?...). But for now I'll hang around and work til I can save up enough to support my next "big" move.


and it feels like its just around the corner ;)

Sunday, June 19, 2011

lovely living : Mt. Luho


welcome to my neighborhood! scroll down for pictures and you will see why i'm glad i chose this place on my second house hunt.



every morning mt luho is my jogging route. a little further down the stretch comes this kickass view.
bolabog beach--the coast of the island where my apartment is at, is a happening place from months of november to march/feb for the Amihan season (east wind). this is where kiteboarders and windsurfers from all over the world come to play. bolabog is voted one of the best kitesurfing places in asia.

righ now habagat season (west wind) had just begun. bolabog and mt luho are now a still and quiet beauty. hence the house arrest i am now in from the weekend long rains. when in doubt--blog.


the smallest building of the three in this picture, right most and white-- is my apartment buiilding! in the island we are known as bahay boracay it is a magnificent beach house. i may well regret leaving but id rather look at it this way-- extremely  grateful to have spent my latest occupancy in the island here. i mean, how often do you ever get to stay in a crib like this? bahay boracay is considerably far from the "town" and you will need to walk a certain distance or call for land transportation to get you around. yet unlike my first 6 months i was out every night and day uncontrollably.  living here has made me stay home more than i ever did (on the island! haha) fresh morning air, sunrise. a spectacular view of the cove. i count myself lucky <3

and so my lullabye for this gorgeous locale. take me somewhere nice by mogwai <3



special thanks to koi busalla for the pictures and letting me tweak them a bit :)

Saturday, June 18, 2011

manila-boracay: there and back again

back in the island--shortly upon my arrival almost abruptly i concluded to a decision to book my flight en route manila together with my mom from her business trip here (next week). earlier on when i had just walked in my city home, i had not the clearest answer to my folks when asked what i had planned for. naive, irresponsible and childish it may had seemed but believe me-- i had a plan.

i just needed to feel it out. before i may come to a conclusion, before i may plan. and there was just one surest event in my manila agenda-- to seal my consultancy deal (the steadiest client cash flow) with my former artist/event management company (which i had nailed neat and clean).

but after 6 months--some things never change and somethings have. i almost forgot that i had put a 6 month quota on myself at the start of all this. its a lovely place-- iknow. i cant always come back when i want to and take people back home with me to share what ive found. being back home felt like i was always the same person and simultaneously otherwise. living in paradise island has taught me:

1. simple living

my room and my things --day in and day out i could not keep myself from going through the stuff in my room--albeit the entire house. what never felt like a lot now feels like too much! i got sooooo much things that i dont need that i am excited than ever to move back home and put up a garage sale. 

our kitchen--unabashedly without my mother's consent (yet eventually so) i had put our kitchen apart and back together. to have me living in my moms house would mean full household authority and domineering meant well.

when i flew back into my (boracay) apartment equally i found a lot among my things that i dont really need anymore. i am taking you home and out you go to the yard sale in a few weeks!

2. i know what i want to be and what i want to do for the rest of my life

i want to be a publicist and a good one of course. day and night, little or much, in between procrastinations i read up or write down some stuff that would make good practice and challenge. even if its just to keep me in the loop and picking my brain for avenues to discover and brand my own sense of style to the profession. i ve tried tons of things in the creatiive department career. im a fine arts graduate and for some what the hell am i doing here and trying this out. artists need not to be translating craft traditionally. theres an art to all things.

3. in relation to number #2

i know myself more. i might take a few seconds to find the right adjectives to describe myself but i know what i'll go for and i know what i wont faster than the speed of light. knowing myself has given me so much courage to speak my mind and in the event people were to argue, i'll know where i stand and how to put them in their place ;)


4. i cannot be with a man who

thinks he's an alpha male just when he is only a simba. real alpha males need not to prove themselves to you. neither are they threatened by you (oh most importantly god almighty!). theyll just pick you up and show you how its done. it can be any age! they give you tons of affection as much as they give you space (hehehehehehehe).  furthermore, i cannot be with someone who's perfume is girlier than mine. i cannot be with someone is not open to the world-- a prep.

5. i will not be with a man just for the hell of having it.

i value my happiness. my happiness is my vanity. a high maintenance vanity.

6. i love my family.

theyre just cooler than ever quirks, smirks and all. we dont need much. just each other. i am so grateful for my mother. i am so grateful for all of them. their worries worry me sick and break my heart like a trainwreck out of hell.  i have broken my moms (and dad's) heart in countless ways imaginable by just being me-- but they always managed to tell me that its ok. i may seem like the irritable impatient and defensive little one but my love for them is immeasurable <3 <3

7. talk shit less and be a mean girl for a good reason

bully the astonishingly stupid and rude. defend the affected and stand up for what is good. i reprimand not go out of hand.

*****

is that it? i know theres more.

all in all. ive never felt so secure. it hasnt been always a bed of roses living here and adjusting to the new life that i have made for myself down here in the beach. i have gained weight and it grosses me to know that the aging has kicked in and i'm borderline my limit-hence  the renovations have begun.



thats my bestfriend in the entire planet and consequently my imoto (little sister in japanese) --rozie delgado. my first night out in manila. in this particular friendship we always end up in the wildest situations possible.  here she is hurting her arm from a completely senseless skateboard fall. while i on the other hand said the craziest shit all night (that i regret and am totally embarrassed of to this minute). when we got to the emergency room, the nurses couldnt keep themselves from gawking and laughing at the passed out ME while rozie got herself checked and x-rayed. whats more-- I DONT REMEMBER TAKING THIS PICTURE!

the given:  we both had a little too much fun.